How to survive the Holidays

Guest Blogger Holly Furtick - Holly wrote a blog recently about surviving the holidays. This is something my wife and I have had to do to make it through. Because as a pastor the holidays are CRAZY! This year I will preach 6 times the week before Christmas. SO we talk about our expectations up front.

Surviving the holidays (Holly Furtick Guest Blogger)

Thanksgiving and Christmas will be here before we know it and I want to share a bit of advice. Of course, I, in no way, consider myself a marriage expert but this is one area my husband and I do well in (not perfectly, but well)... expressing expectations.

Expressing expectations could prevent a huge blowout not just with your husband, but your children and extended family. So taking the scenario of Thanksgiving, here are a few examples of how this works with all relationships...

Yourself. Before you express your expectations to anyone, you must know what your expectations are. Take time to think through a situation. Taking into consideration everyone's schedule...
What day should you leave or invite guests?
What time should you leave or invite guests to come?
How long should you stay?
What problems or obstacles could be avoided (traffic, naptimes, etc)?

You Husband. What do you expect your husband to do over the Thanksgiving holiday? Expressing your expectations before hand can possibly avoid the disaster of you being angry because he sat on the couch watching football all weekend at his parents house and you were inwardly angry with him the whole time.
Do you want him to watch the kids so you can shop the day after Thanksgiving?
Do you want him to help with baths and bedtime while away?

Your Extended Family. Remember that they do not necessarily know the rules/schedule/routines of your family. Be upfront.
We are coming on Wednesday before dinner and leaving on Sunday after church.
Our kids take naps at 2 so can we eat around noon or after 4?
Would you be willing to put the kids to bed Friday night so we can catch a movie together?

Your Children. So often we just whisk our kids away without really telling them where we are going, how long we will stay, and what they will be doing.
Kids, we are going to Grandmas on Wednesday and Aunt Beth on Saturday.
The same rules we have at our house apply at Grandma's
Remember, Grandma has a piano and we don't bang on the piano. We only play with our fingers.

Sometimes its good to remind yourself that its ok to break the rules a little while you're gone. Is it really going to kill your kids to watch a ton of TV for one weekend? Or to eat a ton of junk. Make sure you choose your battles. Express only the expectations that matter the most to you and will make your holiday fun and relaxing.

I will leave you with a few verses

Philippians 2:3-5a...Do nothing from selfish ambition or empty conceit but with humility of mind, let each of you regard one another as more important than yourself. Do not merely look out for you own interest but also for the interest of others. Have this attitude in yourself which was also in Christ Jesus...